In the last little while I have been writing mostly about thoughts and concerns and things that revolve around celebration or resiliency. It is about time I get back to something more concrete. Today’s subject of choice is preparing for meeting with the doctors.
It may be odd to talk about preparing to see a doctor.
ASKING QUESTIONS
The days of his appointment, I would ask my husband if he had questions for the doctor. He usually didn’t have any because he would want to wait for the doctor to speak up before would formulate his questions.
I believe his style is shared by many.
I offer another option.
It is possible to start thinking about what the doctor would say even before he would say it. I must admit, I did this only after having become an experienced ambulance chaser and after a few of my hubby’s brain surgeries.
To do this, making a flow chart was helpful. I would begin with the problem which brought us to the doctor. I would consider what had been offered to my spouse in the past. It usually revolved about medication, tests or surgery.
Medication
My husband’s condition is usually treated with medication. My questions usually revolved around:
- Are there any new ones that may be better suited to his medical reality?
- Will there be augmentation or reduction of any medication?
- How quickly should it take place?
- What side effects could there be?
Tests
My husband’s condition would sometimes have him facing unusual tests in hopes of finding new ways for dealing with his situations.
The possibility of tests usually brought about these questions:
- Which tests?
- Does he need to be hospitalised for the test?
- What information do we hope to get with this test?
- What time frame should the test happen?
- When should we get the information?
- How do we make the appointment?
- Does he need to be accompanied for the test?
- Will his medication be reduced?
- For how long?
- Which risks does that entail?
Surgery
Unfortunately, or fortunately in my husband’s case, the possibility of surgery was offered to stave off worsening seizures. Since he has been through this situation six times, we have come up with some questions.
- What type of surgery is being considered?
- Is it done to him awake or asleep?
- How long should it be?
- How long before it should happen?
- What are the possible consequences?
- How long is the expected hospital stay?
- Will he be able to come home afterwards or will he need to be transferred elsewhere for therapies?
- Will he need constant surveillance once released?
Therapy
The subject of possible therapy was brought up only for the fourth and sixth brain surgeries. The questions I had come up with were:
- What were the names of the centers that he may be sent to?
- Where were they?
- Would he be an inpatient or an outpatient?
- How long may he be there…?
DON’T GO ALONE
Let’s get back to the doctor’s office and the appointment.
First, if there is possibility of difficult news, don’t go alone. In being with someone else you may feel less stressed of having to remember every details the doctor is giving.
Most people choose to have their spouse along with them which makes sense since the lifestyle adjustments that the medical condition may cause needs to be dealt with by both.
If you are not in a committed relationship, consider a sibling or a close friend. In our area, there are also volunteers who can accompany someone for an appointment. In those cases, you must make sure that they would be comfortable to go in with you. There may be limits to what they do.
Points to keep in mind when choosing the set of ears that will help you:
Choose someone who
- is calm
- will respect that you are the patient and you run the show
- is not afraid of bad news
- will join you willingly
- will communicate with you
- will stay with you after the appointment to help you talk it out
- will not blab but respect your privacy.
I hope that these suggestions give you food for thought and a sense of structure.
May all the news that comes your way in these situations be good news.
You are welcome to drop me a line if you have a question or a comment.
Feel free to share the blog or this article in hopes that it lands on the screen of someone who may be beginning their own adventure.
Hope to have you drop by again next week.